Three stores today, well, three grocery stores that is.
Two on purpose, back to one because I forgot garbage bags.
“Say it with me, kids, I cannot leave the store without these five things: garbage bags, dessert, meats, napkins, and peanut butter. Anything else I can forget- not these.”
Then two of them argued over who was going to remind me about the dessert as if… I would really forget the dessert.
But the garbage bags- that’s what I really need help with remembering.
So, when I forgot, I tried to blame them because I had asked them to help, right?
But I stopped after one blame, suddenly coming to my mommy senses, and said, “It’s okay. I forgot, too”.(notice the “too”- I’m still blaming them all while taking personal responsibility- no way I was taking the full brunt of this mistake)
“I’ll just go to the store again, for the third time today”.(a bit more immaturity on my part- just a little reminder about how many times we have been to the store)” Am I the mom or the big sister? O, yes, Mom, yes that’s right.
And that’s not all I did today- I homeschooled my kids today. Yes, all three of them were educated… into this very night… educated.
And we made an advent calendar, yes, they did actually- because they are old enough to do it ALL BY THEMSELVES. Guess what? That is the only reason so much gets done around here- cause they are big and it is not all up to me.
And… I went to the dentist.
I cooked dinner.
I did laundry.
I read, studied, and prayed.
And… I am tired.
One day and three grocery stores plus the business of a regular day and I am tired.
I don’t think I should be but I am. I’m human. Isn’t this season all about the human being tired… and the Savior coming? If I wasn’t human, then I wouldn’t be tired and I wouldn’t need a savior, a place to lay my burden.
I want to write about marriage and submission but again I am so tired… maybe if the kids would stop asking me questions…Why don’t they yell, “Dad!” in the same tone of urgency and with the same frequency?
So, instead of sitting down to write, we listened to Ann Voskamp talk about hope. We sang “O Come All Ye Faithful” together as a family. And my heart was refreshed and renewed- overwhelmed that my King is right here with tired ole’ me. Thank you, Ann. I may have had to apologize again if the lesson was up to me.
And so, tired Momma, may I remind you?
About hope. About your King and how it’s really not a big deal to go to the store three times in one day. May I remind you that without love we are resounding gongs, clanging cymbals? May I remind you that we are nothing that we gain nothing without love. (from 1 Cor. 1:1-3)
So, what does the Bible say LOVE is? Or rather who is LOVE? The Bible says God is Love. 1 John 4:7b
Our source of LOVE is God Himself… maybe little pauses throughout the day are needed to remember just that. I am loved, deeply. I can abide with Him every moment of every day because He has an open door policy for me. He is not the slave driver of my perfection… that is what I do to myself. Rather, He is perfect FOR me.
I can rest.
My kids, your kids, are watching to see if we walk through that open door He is for us… and abide… if our faith is the real deal, rubber meets the road kind of faith… Did this baby Jesus really really come and does He really make a difference?
When I find myself bent out of shape. I can be guaranteed that I am drinking from the well of me… or from other people… that my expectations not being met.
It’s like a little red flag that signals me: You are NOT at the right well. Jesus does not serve up chaos.
On that holy night, with all the trials in the world during that particular time and the pain of labor and the mess of it in a dirty barn…the One whose name is PEACE and LOVE was born.
He wants to be with us and be our Peace and Love in our times with all our trials and in our messy barns.
So, may I remind us: Slow down, breathe deeply, and trust Jesus. He loves us. He is for us. Let’s fix our eyes on Him.
In Christ Alone,